Friday, August 22, 2008

Invite Etiquette 104

This next question has do do with liquor at a reception and offering a cash bar. I feel quite honestly, this is completely unacceptable. Try really hard not to have a cash bar, if your budget is that tight, just don't have alcohol. Or limit the alcohol to beer and wine only - take a peek at this great post by my friend Saundra.
Here is Invitation Consultants take on having a cash bar at the reception:
• How should I indicate that there will be a cash bar at the reception?

What Emily Post would say…any references to food or drink should not be included in the invitation wording (however, it is of course acceptable to include the menu options on your RSVP card).

What we have to add…Your best bet would be to put this information on a reception card if absolutely necessary. Otherwise, again, this is great information to include on your wedding website and to be spread via word of mouth. Other examples that fall into this category would include if you want your guests to know you are having a dry reception.

I hope this information will help you navigate the sometimes bumpy road of wedding invitation wording etiquette. Please feel free to post any questions or comments. And visit our blog for more fun invitation facts!

Thanks so much to Melissa for giving me the opportunity to post this week, it sure has been fun!


Anonymous said...

I've been doing a lot of reading on this topic as it's a concern of mine since I found out (and frankly taken aback) about the etiquette and responses I've read on this situation.

I've also read that open bar/cash bar also seems to be a regional thing as well. FI and I moonlight in wedding videography and live in New England. If I'm a guest I naturally always bring money with me. My FI and I always get a soda from the bar at some point when we are working a wedding and we have had to pay I'd say 95% of the time. It really concerns me that brides have said that they and other guests will grumble at a wedding if it's open then cash bar or all together cash bar.

I understand the comparison of 'well you wouldn't invite a guest to a dinner party at your house and ask them to pay for a glass of wine." True - But a wedding is thousands and thousands of dollars of my hard earned money. My take on it is a bit selfish in the sense that I see it as 'this is our party and we'll provide the best that we can w/in our means' and if it's going to be open and then cash bar then I will spread the word if need be and if a guest is that hard up on the situation then they have the choice of not coming.

Reilly said...

The reader above has an interesting take on the open bar situation! I never realized so many do have a cash bar. We do have a lot of customers inquire about this issue, and we try to pursuade them to inform guests via the word of friends or family.

Here's my opinion-- Your invitation should represent your wedding & be a keepsake, specifications about alcohol belong elsewhere!

Thanks again to Melissa for running our posts! You're the best! Keep up the fabulous blogging!

Jennifer said...

I also never realized that cash bars were so popular, but I could see how it would be more of a faux pas in the South (where I live) rather than in the north. If I went to a wedding that had one, I wouldn't care one way or another, but since I never have cash, I would appreciate a heads up through a website or reception card.

saundra, event engineer said...

First, thanks for the linky love to my post!!!

Anonymous - I'm glad you posted and totally understand what you are saying. Weddings are getting more and more expensive. A full open bar may often be cost prohibitive for most people.

That is where some creativity comes into play. Offer beer (keg?), wine and one signature drink.

Or just beer and wine. We recently had a summer gala for a non-profit and only offered soda, beer, and wine. Guests still drank and they didn't have to get into their wallet.

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