Wedding Processional Order

Thank you Martha Stewart

In a Traditional Christian Wedding Ceremony, this is the order that is usually used. I found this on Martha's site, and I thought it might be helpful for you.

There are tons of variations, make your wedding your own, and don't be afraid to think outside the box, if you want to walk down with both your parents, or your Step-Father and your Biological Father, do it!

Draping the Ceiling

Found on Pinterest via This Blog

Draping the entire ballroom for your wedding can create such a dramatic effect, it's so gorgeous, romantic, and frankly, it's a bit costly.

But it's so pretty!

So, what if you just draped over the head table or family table, and then utilized the drapping effect against the wall?

I love this! This goes in my top 5 Awesometasticness!

Ohhhh, maybe I should create an award? The Awesometastical, Awesometasicy, or just Awesometastic... hmmmm....

Open Letter to Wedding Vendors

I found this post recently on one of my dear friends blogs, and it is verbatim what I have been thinking lately, so I thought stealing borrowing, plagiarising, quoting her, would be the best way to say what I mean.

Photography by: Footstone Photography

This post has been brewing in me for a little while now. It is NOT directed to any one person or situation in particular. But a accumulation of occurrences.

As wedding engineers (er, planners), we get a plethora of wedding vendors that contact us requesting to be on our referred vendor list. Facebook messages, emails, cards, phone calls, and more. We have a process when we recommend a vendor (and yes, we will occasionally recommend vendors that we have not worked with before… as long as they have some stellar testimonials that we check out).

We are also offered many things, one of which a little “kick-back”. “Refer me and I’ll give you $50.” says wedding a vendor.

Honestly that’s not our motivation when referring vendors. For the record, we do not accept kick-backs of any kind. What we prefer is that you (the wedding vendor) extend that $50 towards our client’s service package. You look good, we look good. Win/Win.

However here’s the real needle in the haystack that I want to address in this blog post.

What we really would love, (we = wedding planners) are for wedding vendors that we recommend to do the following:

• Bring your A game and a little more. Seriously. Treat the clients that we bring to you with such great care that they want to be your Bestie as well.
• Want to work with US. That’s right. We bring you into the team-fold to spend all day with you on a Saturday (away from our family), we want you to work with us. If you have ever experienced working with the {wedding planning} team, you KNOW that we don’t ask you to do anything that we wouldn’t do ourselves. In fact, there is no such language as, “That’s not our job” at an event. We pitch in and work hard right along side of you.
• Watch each other’s backs. It takes a full vendor team to execute a fabulous wedding. Everyone doing their part and a little more. We all make mistakes (yes, us too). We’re human. Help us and we’ll help you.
• Be a little more flexible. You know that your job is going to be a little easier with us on site. Timelines and production schedules are complete. All vendors are contacted prior to the wedding. So don’t lump us with all your other DIY clients. We are professional. Time is money and we know what we are doing. A little flexibility goes a long way to repeat referrals.
• Have fun on the wedding day. We pull 17 hours sometimes. Often, we’re the first ones there for setup … to the ceremony … the reception and breaking out. We love what we do, but I won’t lie. Sometimes it can be a long hard work day. Bring a smile and a great attitude. The day will go by faster and easier.
• Communicate with us. Sometimes client’s don’t tell us everything. A rogue Father of the Bride goes off and plans special events during the reception as a surprise and we don’t know anything about it. Let us know ….
• Refer US. You read that correctly. Throw our name out there to YOUR clients. Ask them, “WHO is your wedding planner?” and tell them about us. Tell them why you like to work with us. You should know, we SELL YOU before our clients call you to meet. This is a tight wedding vendor circle and throwing back some love to us is just as important as us always referring you. One sided relationships almost never work. Think about it.

This blog post was from the heart and for educational purposes.

Are you a Wedding Planner?

There are so many professionals that title themselves wedding consultant, I thought I'd run through the true professional differences.

Catering Manager aka Wedding Consultant: Your catering manager is there to make sure your menu is correct on the day of your wedding and the venue is properly staffed. The catering manager makes sure your place settings are set up correctly, and serve your food to your guests. They usually re-fill buffet, attend to beverage needs, and overall , just make sure the venue's rules are followed. If they want to attend all of your vendor meetings, go to the rehearsal organize and orchestrate that as well.... just make sure they know what they are doing. I am sure than make a mean Top Roast, but can they handle mean Aunt Martha?

Church Director aka Wedding Consultant: Your church director is there to make sure the rules of the church are followed, and it is their job to ensure that your wedding planner pulls all of their hair out. In addition, they know the minister's needs and where he likes to stand, talk, and rule the house of God.

Private Events Director aka Wedding Consultant: The Private Events Director handles the needs of an exclusive club, they make sure their members are treated as VIPs, however, they also make sure that the club member's events don't get in the way of the members golf game.

Florist/Designer aka Wedding Consultant: Obviously, handle your florals, sometimes rentals, linens, lighting, and design. Your floral designer can make sure you know the difference between and peonies and a carnation. But sometimes doesn't know the difference between Fuchsia and Raspberry.

Fashion Consultant aka Wedding Consultant: Sells you a dress. Rents you a tuxedo, knows the difference between Vera Wang and Oscar de la Renta. Or Calvin Klein and J. Crew. Has amazing taste in fashion and knows what not to wear.

None of these are Wedding Consultants, although they can call themselves a wedding consultant, because, well they consult the bride.... on very limited topics. And frankly most of them are as organized as your grandma's junk drawer. (no offense, Grandma).

But your real Wedding Consultant is there for you through all of these issues, and knows the difference between a Peonies and a Carnation and what time they should be delivered. We are there to organize and orchestrate through the tremendous amount of details and make sure it all happens perfectly.

Nuff Said.

Things to ask Your Wedding Planner

There are so many things to consider when hiring your vendors, but let's talk about what to look for in your wedding planner. There gazillions of questionnaires online for you to review, download and bring with you to your initial consultations when you interview your potential wedding planner.

But how about some things that may not be on the questionnaires?

What are you going to wear on my wedding day?

•      We wear formal attire, not black tie (unless you request it) but formal, cocktail attire. We don't wear name tags. We want to blend in at your wedding, not stand out like a sore thumb.

How many weddings will you have on my wedding day?

• I will personally only have one. And I'll have a team with me, so we can be in 3 places at the same time.

Will you drink at my wedding?

• Um, no! No professional. You won't see us eat at your wedding (although we will, in shifts), we are there for you and to make sure you are getting what you paid for from all of your vendors and means we are on the clock the whole night.  (not to say, when you get back from your honeymoon we shouldn't all go to Dragonfly and grab a cocktail)

And when you are meeting with your vendors be upfront with them, ask the hard questions, expect answers.

What to Look for in Your Wedding Planner

I honestly mean this, I don't care who you hire, but hire a wedding wedding planner.

If it's me - that's awesometastic!!! If it's not me, and it's that competition that I adore, that's great too!

I do sincerely mean that.

But remember you can't go back and re-do your wedding day. So if you are considering hiring someone to help you make your wedding day dreams come true, make sure they are professional.

Look around, interview a couple of planners, my personality is different than the next guy (although I do have to say, that my personality is pretty darned perfect...ahem!)

Don't be scared to look around. It's okay.

Hire Professionals

Lately, I've been thinking a lot about business and how some people are just cruddy business-people. Amazingly talented in their own right, but honestly have no business, being in business. And, as this isn't a business blog, I am not going to get on a soap box about how to run a business, but rather what to look for in a wedding planner and some mistakes that I made along the way and how I learned from them. So that you can learn from them too.

I am not perfect. I never claimed to be. (that's my disclaimer)

When I started my business I thought "ye with thy lowest prices wins" and honestly.... that may be the case in some instances. And I know everyone has to start somewhere. And I fully appreciate that. I did. I started my business 15 years ago with some pretty low prices...but you can't do that for long. And being in business to purposefully undercut, isn't right.

Just because your collection, package or per hour fee is the lowest, says nothing about who you are. You are in business, just like the other guy, you have over head and bills to pay just like your client.

Just like my client.

People get that.

If you offer a service or a product, like wedding planning, photography there are costs involved, your time, actual and real costs. If your product and/or service is worth it, you will be respected for it.

So, brides, don't hire the cheapest wedding vendor just cuz they are the cheapest.... cheapest won't always save you money. This is a once in a life time event, your wedding. Don't skimp.

You are hiring professionals for a reason.

Hire Professionals!

Not too long ago I did a series on hiring a wedding planner, and posted a letter from a bride who didn't hire us, and how she wished she did. It's here if you want to read it.

Recently, I found a post on the subject with with a tragic series of event that occured because she didn't hire professionals. I found this on one of my favorite people's blog, Mark from Queen of Hearts in Philadelphia.

A Cautionary Wedding Tale



You know that sinking feeling when your gut tells you something is really not a good idea?

That’s the feeling I ignored when my fiancé talked me out of hiring Mark Kingsdorf as my day-of wedding coordinator.


At the time, we were living in an historic home with beautiful grounds next to a stables, and chose to have our wedding at home as an obvious choice. The owners of the stables had taken some bit of persuading to allow us to have a wedding next door: so much so that they insisted that we hire valet parkers to avoid any possible disturbance to the horses as they were brought to and from their stalls and pasture. But somehow, I got it all together, including with a hefty insurance policy and a list of conditions.


My husband-to-be had gone to spend the night with his parents, and as the day of the wedding dawned with blue skies, I felt reasonably confident that I was well prepared for the event to come. I got a lot of teasing about the fact that I had typed up and handed out timelines and task lists, and in addition, I tacked up large posters with even more lists of who was doing what, by when, and how.


Seemed straightforward enough. Until I glanced out the window during a bathroom break between hair and make-up and saw that the tables and chairs were still stacked in a corner of the yard. This part of the set-up had been allocated to my fiancé’s friends, and apparently, not a single one of them had shown up.


I looked up at my carefully choreographed list and saw that I had made one fatal mistake – in my timeline, there was no room built in for error. To get even twenty minutes behind at this stage meant there would be no way everything would be set up on time for the ceremony.


I didn’t know where my fiancé’s friends were and I didn’t have a number to get in touch with them. Frantically, I called my future husband’s cell to no avail. Next, I called my in-laws’ house onlyto be informed that my fiancé was in the middle of a massage and couldn’t be disturbed! My friends and family suddenly found their work load doubled, and I ruthlessly sized up both the very young and the elderly for their suitability to be roped into the task.


Fuming silently – okay, maybe not so silently – I returned to the make-up chair with my updo slightly askew, cursing, panting and lightly sweating. Luckily, I had hired professionals for this job, as I was hardly looking like ideal bride material by this time. A couple of medicinal glasses of champagne later, I finally regained my composure.


With about ten minutes to go before the start of the ceremony, I couldn’t resist looking out the window to check on the progress outside, and that is where I saw, to my utterhorror, a van parked right in front of the pasture gate with the musicians unloading, totally blocking the way for a highly strung horse and his even more highly strung owner.


Aaagh! Disaster!


Frantically, I began yelling to try to get their attention to move the van. Without thinking, I began pounding on the window, and all of a sudden, I had everyone’s attention as my fist went straight through the historic seventeenth century glass and I started to bleed – profusely, in fact!


Oh *****! was my first thought.


Don’t bleed on the dress! was the second.


I’ve just destroyed a piece of our nation’s historic heritage, what am I going to do? That was the last semi-rational thought I had before I unraveled completely.


As far as my second thought was concerned, I had the great fortune that my future brother in law is an emergency room doctor, and even better, he happens to travel with everything you need to stitch up a bleeding bride. It’s a great thing that bandages come in bridal colors…


I was even luckier in the serious matter of replacing a seventeenth century window pane. I came back from my honeymoon to find, by way of fantastic coincidence,someone had decided to do some architectural restoration on another part of the house, and there, up a ladder, I discovered my very own historic window replacement specialist.

Moral of the Story: I dont' care who you hire, but hire a professional wedding planner!

I Regret It!

I can't work with every bride, everywhere. I know that. But there are some weddings that you think after they leave your office that you just need to work with that couple! And I mean NEED! You totally fall head over heals in love with them.

And that is how it was with Erika and Jeff, I just knew it was destiny. Well, a series of events occured and we couldn't work together. After the wedding, I got word that one of her biggest regrets was that she didn't hire us. That made me sad.

We are friends on Facebook and talk all of the time... and frankly I still love her!

Here's Erika's Story. (In her own words)

We got engaged in June of 2006 & set a date for May 5th 2007. We thought that would be ample time to plan, schedule, re-think, re-plan, & re-schedule, at least a couple of times. The first priority, besides the cake, was the photographer. We were incredibly lucky to get the photographer that I dearly wanted. She immediately recommended that we speak to Melissa {MasterPiece Weddings} for our planning needs, so we made an appointment.



After sitting down with Melissa, it became clear to us that there were a number of things that we need to account for, but at the same time, estimates were starting to come for the catering, the cake, we already had a photography contract to sign, the venue, the church, the dress, the tuxes, shoes, honeymoon, etc. Trust me, it adds up IN A HURRY! We had a limited budget & my husband, who has some OCD tendancies & works with chaos every day as an auditor, assured me that he would be able to coordinate, plan & schedule this gala event without any problems at all. "I've got it under control", he said. So, in the sole interest of saving money, we decided to not hire Melissa.....not our smartest decision.

In the months that followed, chaos turned into outright anarchy. There was the small issue of moving the wedding from Gainesville to St. Augustine for starters. Flowers, DJ's, and bridesmaids, Oh my....

Whenever we thought we had a handle on something, Murphy's law was there to slap us on the backside. We had wine labels done, but they were delivered to us & not the winery, so my husband had to drive to Howey in the Hills. It had never occurred to us that we were going to need chairs for the outdoor ceremony.....don't think Melissa would have missed that. We had to get the flowers and the cake to St. Augustine, along with all the dresses and tuxedo's......did I mention that at this point, we were really wishing we had hired Melissa? Then came the big day...

If, for one instant, you think that on the day of your wedding, you will have the time or inclination (there are mimosa's to drink) to meet with all the vendors as they arrive or that they will telepathically know where you want everything set up, you are kidding yourself, trust me, I learned the hard way. We were very fortunate to have am incredible photographer and florist that stepped up to the plate and took control, right when we about to lose it! There is no amount of self planning that can take the place of a talented, experienced, & caring wedding planner like Melissa. When we renew our vows at our 50th, there is no question that Melissa will be running the show.....put it in your blackberry right now Melissa, May 5, 2057....it's the easiest and sanest decision you'll make leading up to your big day.

Need I say more?

{Got it!! You are in the Blackberry}

Photo's By: Caroline Johnson